Brody: Smart people love problems
I am tackling a nebulous subject. I mean, who is smart? What is smart? What is the difference between smart and wise?
And then there are those who are not good students, but turn them loose on a mechanical or architectural problem, and they can think a problem through and fix it.
It got me to thinking.
Here’s my research for this week, born of a quote I heard on a TV show last week: “Smart folks love problems.”
Everyone faces problems in life.
I decided to ask people what they did when faced with daily problems and serious problems.
The first person I asked was a resident here at Brookedale Littleton Assisted Living who, before his stroke, was a successful business executive.
Company problems were his to solve.
When I asked him, he stopped his daily walk, sat on his walker and immediately pushed his shirt sleeves up above his elbows. He said it sort of set the stage to really listen and understand the problem and put his mind one 100 percent to it.
A 92-year-old lady said when confronted with a problem, she almost always burst into tears. When I asked her why the tears, she laughed and said, “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe I am cleaning my brain to better listen to myself.”
Several people said their first response was to try to blame the problem on one person so they could solve the problem with a serious talk. When I asked if this worked, most of the people admitted it usually did not.
A middle-aged man told me he always, when the problem was told to him, excused himself, went to his office to sort it out in private. He did not want the input of others.
On the other hand, the women I asked often did want the ideas of other women to solve the problem at hand.
One woman never liked to hurry to solutions. In fact, she liked to sleep on it. Maybe even dream of a solution to fix it.
A lot depends upon the severity of the problem.
Just asking this question often put a man in a business mode and provoked a “take charge” attitude.
This is quite different if the problem is how to deal with a teenager on drugs or living through a divorce.
A number of people I talked with said the first thing they did to try to solve a problem, big or small, is to meditate and pray about it.
As a matter of fact, I also pray on the spot and then get back to it alone.
One smart lady said as soon as she can be alone with her problem presented to her, she starts to write. She just freely writes all the possible ways to find the best answer for the problem and then later that day or evening, she begins to eliminate some of the answers. Finally, hopefully, she can narrow the possible answers to solve the dilemma.
I talked to a happily married older couple who were now faced with whether it was it the time to give up their home and responsibility that goes with it and move into an assisted living facility. There, all chores are provided for you. It comes with many activities and trips.
This is a really tough problem and both people must agree on the decision.
Often, the guidance of a trained professional person to help you decide this is needed.
If you do not want to involve another person, then there must be lots of loving untimed talking between the two of you that, in the end, make both of you happy and sure it is the best for both.
One thing I do, if possible, to solve a problem is to walk laps. Another thing that works for me is to pick up and stroke my soft kitten.
I let my mind wander freely on the possible solution. My friend, you would be surprised what is in there and how your brain can figure things out if it is free to think on it.
As for the difference between smart and wise, smart generally pertains to learning things. Wise is when you have taken what you have learned and go deeper into the understanding of what you have learned.
Then there are those who can read directions and apply them and fix things but can’t tell you the alphabet.
Everybody faces life problems most every day, and we learn over the years what we have to do to find the solutions.
One thing I know is true is if an important problem falls to you to solve and you ignore even thinking about it, it doesn’t go away just because you don’t want to mull it.
Therefore, finding a way that works for you is vital.
What is your way to solve your problem? Let’s share ideas.
The view from the mountain is wondrous.
Jean Brody is a passionate animal lover and mother. She previously lived in Winchester, but now resides in Littleton, Colorado. Her column has appeared in the Sun for more than 25 years.